16 July 2008


On my way to the bank today, I drove past a couple of little girls selling lemonade on the side of the road. As I drove on, I told myself that I would stop and support their burgeoning business on my way home.

Then, at the bank, I made the mistake of depositing all my cash--I meant to keep out a few bucks. My hasty deposit left me unable to support the little girls.

I, being the "nice guy" that I am, had already imagined how I was going to be their only customer and how they would remember me for years to come as the "nice guy" who stopped to buy their lemonade when no one else cared to notice they had set up a stand. My dream was shattered. I guess I could've asked if they accepted AmEx.

Anyway, seeing the little girls reminded me of selling lemonade with my best friend James when I was a kid. There were a few differences between our lemonade stand and theirs.

First, their stand was on a residential street, not unlike this drawing.

James and I set up shop on the corner of Hamer Dr. (the street our house was on) and Yorba Linda Boulevard (the nearest cross street/busiest street in town), which was sometimes like this picture.

But was usually more like this.

I know those little girls didn't get their lemons at the produce-less Provo Farmers' Market, but I'm sure one of their mothers drove to the store to pick up their supplies in one of these.

James and I, on the other hand, got our lemons from the source (the hybrid lemon tree in our backyard, which produced the HUGEST lemons ever).

(I couldn't resist giving the lemon wheels like the soccer-mom mobile.)

We couldn't do just lemonade, though. Our aspirations were much bigger than that. We had to do Kool-Aid and, of all things, Blow Pops (which our cheerleader sisters had taught us were a staple of life). Those (in our minds) could only be purchased at Smith's. Smith's was several miles away, up the busiest road in town, in another city. Why we chose Smith's, I don't know. Anyway, we walked there. And on the way back, we got chased by some of these.

Okay, it was Orange County. They probably looked more like this.

Or like this (I wish).

Whatever they looked like, chase us they did. So we ran and hid behind some bushes until they got distracted by their reflections or something.

When we finally made it back to our house, we dragged the card table and some folding chairs down to the corner, set up shop, and waited for the customers and the cash to come rolling in.

The little girls today probably made some of this.

And they probably got it from some poor, starving student who didn't just deposit all his or her cash in the bank.

James and I, however, were just lucky we didn't end up like this.

We were just too stationary and the cars were just not stationary enough. No potential customers could spot us in their peripherals as they zoomed past.

Anyway, that's what I thought of when I saw the little girls with the lemonade stand today. I had my camera with me and thought about taking a picture, but then thought of how creepy that would seem and decided against it.


Diane said...

I can't believe your memory! This post should go down in history as one of the best ever! I laughed through the whole thing. Maybe it's because I remember you and James and some of your ventures. Why in the world would you choose the corner of Hamer and Yorba Linda for crying out loud?

Kimberly said...

First of all, I can't believe you walked to Smiths! You two walked everywhere! It must have taken you all day to prepare your lemonade stand! Also, I laughed so hard when I read that you sold blow pops too. You probably thought blow pops were so cool because all the high school kids bought them and ate them. Man, you and James were the best entertainment! There was never a dull moment when you two were around!

Christie said...

This was just HILARIOUS. I especially loved the OC kids getting distracted by their reflections. Excellent mental image.

Marie said...

This was the funniest thing I have read in a long time! I was cracking up so bad that my roommate insisted on knowing what I was reading. So, I read it to her and we were both laughing at how funny and witty this post was. Seriously, if there was an emmy for blog posts, you would win with this guy as a runner up: http://stlewis.blogspot.com/ and that's saying something.

Tina said...

You are so dang funny. My kids just did a lemonade stand and we live in a circle so needless to say, mom and dad were their best customers. I think I would have a total cow if they walked to the grocery store. Its so funny the things that remind us of the past.

Grandma Hand said...

Oh Michael you are so funny. I know you and James really had fun thinking up things to do BUT A LEMONADE STAND?????? Do you ever hear from James? You really did a wonderful post with the illustration especially the Lemon with wheels. You have an imagination that won't quit LOVE YA A LOT!!!!

Robyn said...

You're so funny. And you really got chased? I can just see you and James running from those kids. Ha ha! I'm glad you didn't end up as road kill.

Missy said...

This was so funny. I can really appreciate what you must have gone thru being chased by the shiny happy children of the corn. can realate, having been chased myself more than once. Another thing, kinda funny you're talking about your lemonaid stand, my girls are going to put one together today. They will be selling strawberry lemonaid and cream soda from a cooler on 800 W. Not to busy, not too slow. Plenty of busses will be stopping nearby in the heat of the afternoon. Hope it turns out good. Keep posting.

Anonymous said...

Marie showed me your blog. Reminds me of when Marie wanted to sell pine needle brooms when we were little. Yeah...that didn't happen.

(Marie's Best Friend from Florida)